I've heard before that change is the only constant in this life...and yeah, it's true. Trying to keep things the same is a losing battle and also, just not possible because this is a progressive journey. We take one step forward. We go to sleep at night and wake up to discover a new day before us. Some change is foreseeable like a friend moving away. Other change, like someone you love getting really sick---is something we just can't prepare ourselves for. Oh you unpredictable life...you keep us on our toes.
When I was younger I told my mom that I didn't want to go to college without her. This was probably when I was in middle school. Forward thinking Brooke was already preparing to go off to college somewhere far away. I remember saying to her that I wanted her to move there with me and even be my roommate. I may have been even younger now that I think about it. I had a lot of resistance to change in any capacity. I was jostled by it. I grasped to things staying as they were because it felt comfortable to me. I've gotten better at accepting change nowadays and have been through quite a bit of it this past year, but it is still something that stirs up emotion for me.
I marvel at my close friend Lauren. She just moved from Hawaii to San Francisco. And before that, she moved from Austin to Hawaii. When she relocates, she does so without knowing exactly how things will pan out in her new city and also a deep level of trust that things just will fall into place. I admire her courage and self-trust required to reinvent the wheel through travel over and over again. It's pretty cool and something I aspire to create more in my own life. Making friends with the uncertainty is something I would like to work on more.
This begs the question, why do we grasp? In yoga there is a principle called Aparigrapha, which translates to non-grasping. It is the last of the five Yamas of Patanjali's Eight Limbs of Yoga. I got to practice this pretty intensely recently as a person I became quite fond of, moved away just this morning. When we meet people who excite, us...it can be really tempting to cling on to them and wonder what will happen once the experience ends. The real challenge, for me and for most of us, is to take the experience for what it is, without trying to change it or grasp onto it. Thank you universe for the opportunity to practice this beautiful lesson.
Parinamavada is another Sanskrit word meaning "everything is in a constant state of flux." This realization is so liberating. We won't feel good all the time. There will always be a contraction after an experience of expansion and so we may need to go inward for a bit. Non-grasping is so freeing. Just as the seasons change, so do our experiences.
Personally, I'm going to take this time to offer tender love to myself. Just this week, I have several nurturing experiences set up including dinner with two people I adore at my favorite restaurant, Yoga and coffee with another dear one, yoga therapy as a client (I can barely believe this--how important to be a client!), a poetry reading, many many baths, writing opportunities and fruitful discussion. Plus through all of this I am nurturing my sweet business and she needs my attention too.
Alas, change. And now the inquiry of yoga. Until next time,
Brooke